The Condo is Rented

I received an e-mail from the property manager tonight during one of those freak moments when the Internet was working. Our condo has been rented for July 1st. They passed the inspections of the property manager and the Home Owners Association credit screening. 

As impatient as I can be at times, this really happened fast considering we have not owned it for 60 days yet.

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All Washed Up, But Not Going to Dish It Out

Yesterday was the day our appliances were going to be delivered to our place in Florida. The property manager was planning on being there for the delivery and promised to e-mail a progress report. There was no reason for us to hang around, being six hours ahead and 3,000 miles away, so we went out for the evening.

When we returned home, I found this e-mail from our property manager. "I am at the unit with Brandsmart and it seems like you ordered 2 washing machines instead of a dishwasher, I have them taking one back to replace but I'm sure the dishwasher is cheaper so you will have to get a credit from them. I will verify the prices when I get back to the office but in the meantime please double check the order."

I start spinning like a top. I knew I did not order a dishwasher, but I was also positive I did not order 2 washing machines either. I found the receipts that I had already sent to the property manager, wondering where he even came up with the idea of a dishwasher. By gosh, I have to hand wash my dishes, the tenants should have to also. But 2 washing machines? Where was he getting this. 

I had multiple copies of receipts. I forwarded each one to Alain, our property manager, stuffing up his Blackberry with data. I envision his Blackberry becoming so engorged,  blackberry juice squirts in all directions drenching him. Well fine then. That will teach him to read the invoices properly and see there was never a dishwasher on the list. The 2 washing machines were the screw up of BrandsMart. What can I say?

For the 47th time, I look over the receipts for the appliances I had ordered. Refrigerator, microwave, stove, washing machine, dryer. Quantity: 1, 1, 1, 2, 1. Whoa! Back up there. Where did that 2 come from. As it turns out, with all of the order numbers, sku numbers, dimensions, prices, and capacities listed on the paperwork, the quantities did not pop out at me. I admit that I have a mild form of dyscalculia, the numbers version of dyslexia. My mild version results in number reversal. If I need to use 21, I have make sure I do not put 12 instead. This takes a great deal of time checking and rechecking, especially with all of the districts, building numbers, prices, and phone numbers included in my books.

Calling Florida to get this straightened out again is going to be another joy ride, but life is one adventure after another. 

The icing on the cake is that the appliances did not come with power cords. You have to buy them separately. When the hell did that happen? Every washer and dryer I have ever bought had an electric cord permanently attached to the back. When did this stop, but the better question is why did it? To gouge more money from the buyer? These cords are $15-30. each. God bless capitalism, consumerism, corporations, and God help the working poor, the destitute, the disadvantaged.

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Fun in the Sun Via the Internet

How to buy an apartment online. Perhaps I should write a little booklet.

Closing was on Tuesday. Check that off the to do list.

Hired property manager on Tuesday. Check! 

Hired painters on Tuesday. Check!

Painters arrived on Wednesday. Check!

Picked out appliances to be ordered on Wednesday. Check!

Created online account with Florida Power and Light on Wednesday. Check!

Moved electric service into my name on Thursday. No Check! Tilt! Nada, Nincs, No way Jose.

Their online form would not accept our address as a valid one. Sent an e-mail to our association manager who suggested six different ways of entering the address, most of them not using the name of the street as McNab, but rather 15th Street. I have not cared for the name McNab anyway. It sounds like the name of a pickpocket at a fast food restaurant run by clowns. Still nothing, so today I called Florida. 

When you hear the initial message warning about how overworked they are taking other callers just like you, so please stand by, I just want to scream "HIRE more people if you are that busy." But before I could form the words, a live person as speaking to me. Within minutes she opened an account in my name and after asking for my social security number, she informed me that due to my "excellent credit" I would not need to make a deposit. Left me wondering what else she could divine from those nine SS digits. Kind of scary! So we were moving along nicely when her computer refused to cooperate. It seems that their software requires a middle name or bare minimum an initial. Sorry, I don't have either. Sorry, the computer will not let you move on to the next level in this game called FPL. What I was informed I had to do was fax in a scan of my passport or birth certificate showing I had no middle initial or name. Temptation crept in prompting me to say "Gosh darn it. I had forgotten about that F. that sometimes appears between the Ryan and James at rare times. However, if I had, it may have messed with my excellent credit. 

When I feigned ever seeing a fax machine in this foreign country, I was transferred to another woman. She too was super professional, asked me what the problem was. She put me on hold for a couple of minutes and came back to say they would by-pass the computer code and open my account.  How many parents living in Florida are feeling obligated to give their new born a middle name, because per chance that child may need electric service of their own.

Had I known when I changed my name legally from Richard James French Jr. to Ryan James that I may one day need a middle initial or name, I would still wouldn't have done it. That was in 1978 and this is the first time it has ever been an issue. Go figure.  

So now 4035 15th Street, 203 has electricity. I hope to hell that is either 4035 McNab 203F or 4035 15th Street SW. If not, I hope whoever it is knows what being GREEN is all about.

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Done Deal

It only took 1,493 e-mails, but it is done. We now own a condo at 4035 W. McNab Rd. # 203F in Pompano Beach, FL 33069 or the alternative address that the electric company seems to prefer is 4035 SW 15th Street, Pompano Beach, FL 33069. The closing was completed today at 9 am Florida time.

I hired a property manager who will start on May 1st. The painter I hired will start tomorrow. When that is done, the order for the stove, refrigerator, microwave, washer and dryer will be placed and delivered. We will be all set to open for the business of renting.

If Mike G. should ever read this, I owe him a humongous debt of gratitude for being my eyes on the ground and reporting back to me everything he observed. He went above and beyond a long-term friend, but since I have only known him from e-mails and than only since February, he is incredible.

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